Do I want to go camping?

I ain't much of a camper, I got to admit. I don't like it if I can't take a shower right after I wake up, and I got all kinds of problems with campground outhouses/no outhouses at all. But camping is a different kind of thing, you know? You are out under the sky and there is a small square barbecue for each campground, and you and your friends just act differently because it's a totally different environment. It can be pretty wild, seeing how folks come outta the woodwork in various ways. Last time we went camping this really drunk guy wandered over to our beach bonfire and kept repeating how many bottles of wine he had drunk (2 or 3, something like that). I wanted to ditch out and maybe throw a log at him but Beef just played along with his rambling, and at one point helped him back up to the campground to his spot while consoling him on his recent divorce. Weird how some cats are.

Anyhow, I can see the appeal if you got all kinds of North Face and REI stuff all kicked and crunked, just zipped and velcroed and worked down tight, total gear pro. Then you can be comfortable, all with some fine leather Nike hiking booties and black tights to cut down wind resistance, plus a ripstop wool skullcap that covers the ears, maybe with some fun dangly ear cords for pulling it down. Like Sting would have. You can look hell of sexy in some camping gear. Maybe I'll get one of those Thule roof racks for the Escalade.